GenderPTSD is real

2 scares this week with middle. One, a letter, turns out to be for meningococcal vaccine 🙄 and one teams appointment must be kept during the holiday, turns out to be innocuous. The fear is real though. The worry and heart drop still there. Is this a letter from the adult gender clinic? Is this a video call with a gender Dr? Is this package medicine? 😕 She let us know about both which should fill me with ease. She's at least communicating with us. I sometimes feel though, that I'm being lulled into a false sense of security because I trust nothing anymore. I hate feeling like this. I hate feeling everything is weighted, everything is tainted, everything is worrying, everything is off.

I really need this upcoming holiday to alleviate some of my stress and anxiety. My mind and body need a rest. 🌞😎